


It Was Aliens

by nikogda



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Crack, Louis is high like for all of this fic, M/M, Tinfoil hats, mention of being high, mention of drugs, mentions of aliens? i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-13
Updated: 2019-03-13
Packaged: 2019-11-16 11:24:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,734
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18093383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nikogda/pseuds/nikogda
Summary: Harry's day started normally but ended with unusual and unexpected uses for tinfoil.Or...The one where Louis is high af.





	It Was Aliens

**Author's Note:**

> This came about while I was working on another fic and saw a photo of a cat with a tinfoil hat on.
> 
> I rated this as Mature due to some content even if it may not be that mature... I much rather be safe.
> 
> THANKS, LYNDA FOR BEING A BETA ONCE AGAIN. LOL. 
> 
>  
> 
> I am 100% gifting this to my Az. Hugs in 2020!

Harry tossed his keys on to the small table beside the front door and took his shoes off. He ran his fingers through his hair, the rain causing it to frizz on his way from the car to the porch. He sighed as he was also overwhelmed by the heavy smell of pot. He didn’t have an issue with Louis smoking it, none at all since he would be a hypocrite to say so. But he did hate how it would overwhelm the normal smell of his home. Also because his Mum was due to bring over a casserole she’d made for them and she would immediately smell it. He was pretty sure she knew he smoked pot, but there was a huge difference in her suspecting it and her actually smelling it in his home. 

He headed into the kitchen and pushed open the window over the sink and turned on the fan over the stove before wandering into the living area. He stepped down the three wooden steps into the sunken area and spotted Louis sitting on a pile of oversized pillows sipping on a juice pack. He spotted Harry and smiled brightly.

“Baby! You’re home. I love you, how are you? What’s up?” Louis rattled off quickly before taking another sip of the juice. It was empty and he had sucked the packet until it was flat and wrinkled. 

Harry went over and opened the back sliding door, making sure the screen was closed before taking the empty package from Louis who was inspecting it with a frown, “Babe, Mum’s coming over in a few and the house reeks.”

“I’m sorry.” He was pouting now and Harry sighed as he kneeled down in front of Louis. He leaned in and kissed his chapped lips softly. 

Louis tasted like carrot cake and fruit punch. Harry frowned against Louis’ lips, “Love, did you eat a cupcake?” He stayed squatted in front of Louis as he picked at the tear in his jeans.

“I couldn’t help myself. You’ve banned me from using the stove when I smoke and I needed something and I don’t know where you keep the gummy bears, or worms, or sloths, or starfish, or octopus or --” Harry cut Louis off with a quick kiss as he smiled. 

He stood up and went to the large entertainment center and pulled a pack of gummy worms out of a drawer and tossed them to Louis. Louis squealed in absolute delight and laid down, starfished on the floor. Harry grabbed a few, well more like five sticks of incense and lit them, stuffing them in random holders around the living area. He turned on the ceiling fan in the living area before he headed back into the kitchen to place the last stick. 

He was humming to himself as he wandered around the kitchen. It was small, just right for the two of them. Sometimes three or four when a sister or his Mum was over. Fizzy lived down the street and his Mum lived around the block so they often came and went and sometimes at the same time. It was a perfect small place that was also private. They could have dinner parties outside and come and go easily and live in a private bubble. They loved it because they didn’t feel sheltered and they didn’t feel like they were sneaking around. It was a gated community and it wasn’t over the top in a super expensive type of way. It still felt homie and a way of normalcy. Not like the homes the public saw them owning. It was just right and perfect. Harry set the cupcakes out and noticed an empty blue and white polka dotted wrapper still neatly tucked into the pan. He laughed to himself and wondered briefly what went through his husband’s mind at even putting the wrapper back. 

Harry grabbed a bottle of wine out of the fridge and a few glasses from above the cabinet and set them out. He lit a candle on the bar and peered under the cabinets above the bar into the living room. He could see Louis laying there with the bag of gummy worms on his chest, his feet swaying from side to side. 

“Babe, did you like the cupcake?" Harry asked from his spot, watching Louis.

He heard a pleased hum from Louis. “Loved it. Ten, ten would eat again.” 

“Great. I’ll have to make them again. I wasn’t sure what they would taste like. It was a new recipe called, Avocado Carrot Cupcakes.” He watched on in amusement as Louis shot up.

“What? Excuse me? Avocado what? How?” 

Harry snorted at Louis baffled expression, he was wiping his tongue with his sleeve. “Avocado carrot cupcakes. Good, huh?”

Louis shook his head and pointed at Harry before he stood up, “Going to go brush me teeth now. Thanks for poisoning me, love”

Harry snorted as he disappeared and went back to trying to air out the place and tidying up. He turned on some music to fill the silence before he decided to go change into something more comfortable since it was just his mum. 

When Harry walked into the bedroom the last thing he expected to see was his cat, Oreo, sitting on the bed. Actually no, that wasn’t it. It was the fact that his small black and white cat had tinfoil on his head with massive triangles for his ears. He blinked at him, getting a mew in return. Louis came out of the bathroom naked with a towel wrapped around his head. 

“Babe, what did you do to my cat?” Harry asked, eyeing Louis up and down before he blinked a few times and put his attention back on Oreo who was currently attempting to lick himself. 

Louis tossed the towel on the floor and cocked his hip, he gave Harry a look as if he should know. “I didn’t want them listening to his thoughts. He’s too innocent to have his thoughts stolen, H” 

Harry blinked a few times before turning to leave. He would change later, he needed a glass of wine. He left Louis and Oreo in the bedroom and went to pop the cork on the wine bottle, pouring a hefty glass for himself. He chugged it down in one go and sat it down, leaning on the counter. He had so many questions and at the same time, he was pretty sure he had all the answers. It was Louis. It was that simple. He really could get weird when he was high as fuck. He had to talk to Calvin because he was the last one to supply the weed to Louis and he was sure it wasn’t just weed. Only when he was high on Calvin’s weed did Louis talk about aliens. 

As if he heard Harry’s thoughts Louis walked in naked, carrying Oreo in his arms. Harry did a double take. Louis had his own tinfoil hat on and when Harry’s eyes went down his naked body he realised he’d covered his bits with aluminum too. 

“Louis, do I want to know why your cock is covered in aluminum?” He was leaning on the bar, watching as Louis shrugged.

“Figured me bits are just as important as the brain. Covered all corners, want me to make you one too?” He asked Harry as he sat Oreo down on the sofa back.

“Not right now, Lou, but thanks. How about you go get dressed though? Mum’s on her way, remember?” He watched as Louis saluted him and turned, swaying his hips as he walked away.

Harry wanted to bite that bum. The doorbell startled him from the small thought of his husband’s ass and he pushed off the bar, heading to the front door and opening it with a big smile. His mum’s smile greeted him in return with a hug and kiss to the cheek, acting as if it had been ages since she last saw him when he was pretty sure they just played scrabble with her and Gemma last weekend. 

“Mum, come in, it's drizzling out there.” She smiled, handing him the dish and took her coat off, handing it to Harry also before heading on into the living area. Fortunately, his attempts at clearing the air appeared to have been effective.

He hung up her coat as he heard Louis’ voice cheerfully greet her and he smiled to himself as he headed to the kitchen to set the casserole on the counter before going into the living area. He nearly tripped down the steps into the sunken living area as he noticed that both Louis and Oreo had their aluminum hats on still. 

Harry’s mum, bless her heart, didn’t even bat an eye. Thankfully Harry was able to remove Louis’ hat without much of a fuss, although a few kisses had to be bestowed before Louis gave in. They had dinner without any issues as Louis sobered up and mellowed out, chatting away with Anne and complimenting her on her dish. It was alfredo and broccoli stuffed shells and he ignored Harry’s side of spinach, telling him it smelled like shit. After dinner, they chatted, sharing the wine bottle before Anne called attention to the time with a yawn and Harry called her a ride home since she’d had a few glasses. They all parted ways with hugs and Louis told Harry he was going to go change. Harry nodded as he began to clean up from dinner and put away the leftovers. He was draining the last bit of wine from the bottle into his mouth when he heard Louis clear his throat. He nearly dropped the bottle when he saw him standing there, aluminum covering his dick once more and a smirk on his face.

“Why don’t you come and take this off for me,” He said to Harry, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Did you wear that all night?” Harry asked as he sat the bottle on the bar. 

Louis laughed at him before shaking his head, “No, but if you don’t want it off me, I guess I can just go.” He turned to walk away and Harry grabbed a dish towel and rolled it up before slapping it against Louis’ left bum cheek.

Louis yelled and jumped, turning away to run to the bedroom with Harry close behind him.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! A link to a Tumblr post is [Here!](http://bringmetheharry.tumblr.com/post/183416318732/it-was-aliens-harrys-day-started-normally-but) If you feel like sharing it, I appreciate it. Have a great day!


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